But..
Does it really have to be like this? Having this, losing the other?
People says, secondary school friends are the most valuable friends among all, cause they go through the craziest moment in your life.
I agree with this.
but now, i think im losing them.
Losing the whole bunch of them.
I'm having a different schedule from them.. When I have my exam, they have their holidays. When I have my holidays, they are busy.
I'm so overload with studies and events, I didn't even have time going for a yumcha session, with anyone of them. Not even my uni mates.
But they take it as I pull myself out of the group.
They take it as I never join them before because I don't want to.
I have my job to do.
I have my studies to go with.
If working for my own expense is too much for a friend, then I think thats all.
I feel that I'm further and further already.
Further from what we use to be.
No one reply to me anymore.
No one even care about asking me out, as I always reject because of work.
Not even my BEST FRIEND's birthday surprise.
I know I'm acting like a super immature child now, whining for nothing.
But I'm confused.
I wondered.
Does growing up means being strong? Being strong = Being on your own?
I don't feel belong anymore.
Not to any group, any people, any one
I am all by myself now
Like what I use to be
and all i need to do,
Is to get along with that.
And I know I cant
But I have to.
It's time for me to leave,as what they think I am.
No more ME time.
As i have my own responsibility to take care of.
and thats my burden to be carry.
It is time.
I love you,
as you are always me, and I'm you.
Nikki Sim, you can do this.
