Think.

I think alot. I think always. Someone told me not to think too much, but yet, I still think.

Thinking makes me feel alive. Thinking makes my brain spin. Thinking eat up my overload energy. Thinking makes me feel that, I'm not alone.

I always feel alone. Like nobody around me. Like no one cares. Like no one is ever there. 

But I don't like to be with groups of people. Especially those I know. 

Groups of stranger are okay, but not friends. But not family. 

I don't like to be with those who thinks that they  know me, but they don't.

I'm always creating different images for different people, showing different me to different them. 

I'm not faking.

They are all me

Just that they are part of me, part of me that I think people will like it. 

Part of me that will make that people feels comfortable.

Part of me that will make that people likes me.

It is tiring I know.

But I enjoy doing it. 

At least no awkward situation coming out. LOL

I myself don't know who am I, why am I here, and what am I doing.

I'm constantly exploring, constantly looking into the deep side of me, and constantly hiding.

Hide, so that I can clearly show that part to someone who appreciate.

Hide, so that I have my own line of defense.

Hide, so that I'm safe. Alone.

So there's one question.

That I've been thinking.

Today.

"At a stage where millions of people, including your loved ones, and those who are super close with you, are watching, you have only two choices to choose.

A. To expose yourself completely naked.

B. To expose all your dark secrets, all your thoughts and all you've been thinking all these while, on a video, to all people out there.

What will you choose?

I wonder.